Christian Family Life

Distance Homeschooling

2011-09-12T21:43:00.001-04:00

I wish I could tell you I took to being a father like a fish to water. Nothing in my life prepared me for small children. Yes, I had a dad. I still have a dad. But I was completely insulated from dealing with babies and small children. I was clueless, and there was nobody to teach, mentor, or disciple me. Not my dad (I lived in New Jersey, he still lives in Texas), not my father in law, and definitely not my wife. I had no close friends with small children. So I was on my own for much of the early years of my children's lives.

Now that they're 6 and 7, things are much easier. I can relate to them. I can reason with them. I can joke with them. And I can still kick their butts.

When I first met Christina in 2000 (Y2K), I'd been doing some reading on homeschooling. I shared that reading with her. Somehow, she agreed. We had Joshua in 2004, and I changed jobs so she could stay home with the kids. We had Caleb in 2005. We've been a single income family since March of 2005, when my employer at the time, BAE Systems, hired me from contract to full time employee, and Christina resigned her job in HR at a lumber yard. It's been tough, and we've made a lot of hard choices, but somehow we've made it with one income.

That got even more challenging last year. I was laid off from an engineering job. Things had been going south on that job for months, and it finally came to an end. By the time I was laid off in March of 2010, Christina had already been homeschooling the kids. Unfortunately, the books I had been reading were on WHY to homeschool, not HOW. I left a lot of it up to her. While my job was heading south, most of my reading was on how to run my own business or develop my skills to get a better job. I read books like "Escape From Cubicle Nation" and several Robert Bly and John T. Reed books on freelance writing and copywriting. Christina grew frustated that I wasn't helping her with homeschooling.

I went into Real Estate for a while. I'd always been interested, and since I couldn't find a decent job in a reasonable distance, I got my Real Estate license. I worked with Weichert. I actually sold one house in the 2010 New Jersey market.

I'm sure if I'd had enough time, I could have done really well in real estate. It was a lot of fun. But it takes a long time to build up a pipeline of future business, and I just didn't have that time available. An application of mine was accepted for a job in the Washington D.C. area, and I was offered an interview.

By this point, I was open to a job in any location I had friends or family I could stay with. I would have taken San Antonio, TX, Lexinton, KY, or even outside Detroit, MI where I knew people. So when I got the offer for the D.C area job, I had a friend there. I had an appoitment with an client for my real estate business, but the D.C. job was able to schedule the interview early enough in the morning to make it back to NJ by the afternoon for my appointment, so I went. I stayed with my friend, who had similar job experience and helped prep me.

Because this blog is intended to be from a Christian worldview, I will admit I am not totally faultless for my job in Philadelphia coming to an end. I screwed several things up. I don't hold the company I worked for faultless, and it ended badly for both of us. A few days before the interview in the D.C. area, I repented to God of some of the pride I had when that job died. I repented for my failure, and humbled myself. I committed myself before Him to return to one of the conditions that led to the end of that job. I said I would be humbled and live with that condition again if that's what He wanted. And within days, I had an interview. It's subjective, but I stand by it.

Also, strangely enough, was something Christina told me. When I was laid off, my previous job had completely traumatized me to cubicles. Yes, it sounds silly, but in 2 years, I had a cubicle right outside of a conference room and in a high traffic area, another cubicle shared with a shared printer, and another cubicle next to the coffee pot. I couldn't concentrate with people walking past and making lots of noise, and I let it bother me too much. That's part of the humbling. The Sunday before the interview, as we were driving to church for Sunday night service, Christina told me "I have a feeling that you'll be working in Virginia for 2 years." My internal response is not fit for this blog. I asked what she was talking about. At that point, I was determined to make it in real estate. I had freedom. No cubicles. Unlimited potential. A different situation every day. But on Sunday she made that comment, and Wednesday, I had a request for an interview. I coordinated with my friend, packed and went down.

I aced the interview. It took more than 2 months to get through HR, but I started in October (after an August interview; thanks for your quick response, HR!) I now work in Virginia, but still have a house and family in New Jersey.

I don't write this for any pity at all. I enjoy my job. I have a lot of potential here. I have some good friends. The hard part is, I live 180 miles from my wife and children, and only see them every 2 weeks. But the work is awesome, and I even have my own office, with a desk where I can see the door. Nobody sneaks up behind me, and I'm much more productive. On my last job, the guy who was supposedly my manager would sneak up behind me a grab my shoulders. It took a LOT of willpower not to knock the consciousness out of him. When he grabbed my shoulders unexpectedly, I really wanted to stand up and punch him. I don't like being snuck up on like that, and my requests for him to to do that anymore went ignored.

But with a decent paycheck, great benefits, and great career potential, I'm left with kids whom we're trying to homechool, and the question of how to do my part?

Christina has done a great job with Joshua, who is 7. But Caleb was refusing to read. A couple years ago, I downloaded the McGuffey Readers, and last year while I was unemployed, I worked with Joshua on them.

Since Caleb, who is 6, was refusing to learn to read (although he LOVES math), I somehow realized I had to take charge. But how? I'm 180 miles away and only home for 3 days every 2 weeks. I'm an IT professional. If only the technology existed...

What I ended up doing was having Christina create a Skype account for herself. She actually made one for Caleb. Skype, for free, allows voice and video chat through IP. It also allows the sharing of the desktop. So what I do to teach Caleb to read is, I load the McGuffey Primer on my monitor. When Caleb calls, I talk to him for a little while. Then I walk him through a lesson or two of McGuffey. Then, if he does a good job, I offer him the chance to watch Wipeout through Hulu or YouTube. That seems to work.

Believe it or not, it's allowed me the chance to teach my son to read from 180 miles away. He's getting better. And for the first time in homschooling, I'm able to be involved.

Should I Keep This Blog?

2010-12-21T21:20:00.001-05:00

I started this blog in 2005 after my wife and I had our second child, Caleb. You can tell how long it’s been since the picture was updated. I had some grand ideas for this blog.

The problem is, right after I started it, I realized just how unqualified I am to write it.

Most times, I feel like I’m a failure as a husband, a father, a professional, and as a Christian. Hence, I’m not fit to write about “Christian Family Life”.

But then again, who is?

I’ve started and stopped many blogs. My main blog is currently here, although I haven’t updated it in a while. I’ve tried splitting the topics I’m interested in out, and I’ve tried keeping them in one place.

The weird thing is, occasionally, I get an email, or Facebook contact, or something about this blog, which I’ve done very little with. Every now and again, it seems to help somebody.

Whether I’m qualified to write it or not, I have found that sometimes, a small tip from a fellow traveller who has been a little farther down the same road can be more helpful than a travel guide written by an ivory tower “expert”.

So if this blog is useful to you, let me know.

When I entered fatherhood (heck when I got married), I realized just how unprepared I was. Nothing in my life, not my family, friends, education, anything, had prepared me for what I was to face. And I planted my face on the pavement each and every time I tried like a never-ending run of “It Only Hurts When I Laugh” (Caleb’s favorite show).

I believe discipleship is being able to walk with somebody who has been there, while you’re going there. Jesus picked 12 men to walk with Him. They lived with Him, ministered with Him, were corrected by Him, and above all, prepared by Him. I believe discipleship in the church is missing that component. At least, in the churches I’ve been to and the books I’ve read.

So if you get any use from this blog, let me know. I’ll be happy to post my failures (and maybe the success or two I’ve had) here for edification.

Guest Post: Parents, Get This Book

2010-12-21T19:43:00.001-05:00

This is the first guest post I’ve gotten as a blogger.

=============
“MOM, DAD, I’M BORED.”
3 Easy Activities for Moms, Dads & Their Kids to Share During the Holiday Break
Editor’s Note: You have full permission to use this text and images on your Website, blog and/or publication. Any questions, or for high-res images, contact Roy G. Miller, roy@marketingzen.com, or call 903.422.5117.
•••
The kids are restless, Dad’s glued to the torrential downpour of football games on the TV and the kids are BORED. What’s a holiday-exhausted Mom to do? Forget shopping, chores and barking back at bored kids, try something different and have some holiday fun. Try these three Mom-friendly activities. You’ll be glad you did. So will your kids.
Fun Time #1: Take the BORED out of Board-dom. Go to that forgotten stack of board games in the back closet and re-introduce your kids to great classics like Operation, CandyLand, Battleship, Clue , Trouble and more. Get even more basic, play a game of checkers! Show your kids that fun and entertainment don’t have to blip, flash, explode or require double AA batteries.
Fun Time #2: Story Time. Wait until bedtime, slip on the PJs, warm up the hot chocolate and fire up the fireplace. Get the gets comfortable and focused, then re-kindle the magic of yesteryear with Story Time that tells a dramatic, kid-relevant story—a story that shares the real story of Christmas through the eyes of Little Star. This new children’s book from Author Anthony DeStefano tells the story of one little, insignificant Star and how he becomes more than significant by ushering in a newborn King named Jesus.
AN EXTRA BONUS! SEE PAT BOONE read the story at http://tinyurl.com/littlestar, or get your own copy. More at www.anthonydestefano.com.
Fun Time #3: A Hilarious History Lesson. Give your kids the laugh of a lifetime and share a little of your family history too. Blow the dust off those photo albums—and boxes of old photos—and let them see you and Mom when you were kids and teenagers. Yeah, they’ll gasp and gawk and never stop ribbing you about it. It’s a great time to reminisce and roar with laughter. Plus, your kids will now understand why you’re always taking their pictures. You can make fun of them in 20 years!
Happy Holidays!
####

Anthony DeStefano

www.anthonydestefano.com

“Have you thought about Heaven lately? Wonder what it’s like? How you can get there? A Travel Guide to Heaven explains it all. And while it may be your final destination, it will be the best trip you ever took. Heaven, it turns out, really is Heaven!”

The Christian Chronicle » features » people » Tank Daniels' church family hoping for Giants win in Super Bowl

2008-01-22T19:04:00.001-05:00

The Christian Chronicle » features » people » Tank Daniels' church family hoping for Giants win in Super Bowl

I honestly don't care for sports. I'm pretty much apathetic to sports. I'll make one exception though. A member of my church is going to the Super Bowl. I probably won't pay any more attention to the Super Bowl than I ever have (which is very little), but I will follow the admonition no matter what the outcome:

Rom 12:15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.(NKJV)

I've never really cared who won the Super Bowl, but this year I *might* fell a tug in my heart toward the Giants.

Technorati Tags: Super Bowl,Football,Giants,Church member

Children and TV

2008-01-22T13:32:00.001-05:00

This will be a short post. I might put up a longer post the topic of children sleeping in bed. Our children sleep in the bed with us. It's a long story, which I may cover later. This post is nothing more than an anecdote.

I get up at 5 AM during the week, so I typically go to bed early. I take one of our kids with me and my wife comes to bed with the other one later. I usually watch TV until the kid I brought to bed with me falls asleep, then I roll over. Lately I've developed an obsession with the show "House", and I've been watching seasons 1 and 2 in the DVD player at night. One morning, after watching House with me the night before, my two year old, Caleb, woke up and told my wife "We need a crash cart in here."

Heh, heh, heh.

Actually, I have several subjects that I can write about later.

Ransomed Heart Podcast

2008-01-22T06:54:00.001-05:00

For anyone interesting, Ransomed Heart has a podcast. Ransomed Heart is the ministry of John Eldridge, author of "Wild At Heart" and several other books. I read both "Wild At Heart" and "The Way of the Wild Heart" last year. You can subscribe to the podcast at http://www.ransomedheart.com/podcast or through the iTunes store directly. Both audio and video are available. I can't provide a review as I just subscribed. I'll write more after I've had a chance to listen.

Its VBS Week Again!

2007-07-16T07:33:00.001-04:00

This week is VBS at the Pitman church of Christ. Each year our church puts on a Vacation Bible School for the children along with an adult component featuring, as our minister said yesterday "an exceptionally gifted adult speaker". This year we have John Clayton from Does God Exist? as our speaker. John is a retired high school science teacher and a former atheist and his sessions so far have been captivating.

As a parent, I'm almost choked up with VBS this year. My boys are 54 weeks apart. Last year they both spent VBS in the nursery, but this year Joshua (who will be 3 next week) was able to participate in the children's program. Just before the session started, we sat him in the 2 year old pew and he sat there quietly with his friends. The teens from the church that are handling our VBS escorted the children downstairs. When I took Joshua to bed last night, he could actually sing most of the words to "Jesus Loves Me". He looks forward to going back for tonight's session.

Blog Reorganization

2007-07-04T16:49:00.001-04:00

I haven't written on this blog in quite a while. I have several blogs, but I only use my main blog for most posting. I decided that in order to write about more interests, I would start using this blog again. I've had several ideas lately for Bible studies that don't fit very well with the theme of my other blog, so I hoped to use this one more often. If you enjoy my Bible studies I hope you'll stick around.

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Is a mass forwarded email really a blessing or prayer?

2006-10-30T09:32:00.000-05:00

I got the following in an email over the weekend:

Dear Friends and Family,

I was asked by a very special friend as part of her religion class who I thought would DO this. I hope I chose the right twelve. Please send this back to me. (You'll see why.) In case anyone is interested. May everyone who receives this message be blessed. REMEMBER to say a prayer before you read the poem. That's all you have to do. There is nothing attached. Just send this to eleven people.

Prayer is one of the best free gifts we receive. There is no cost but a lot of reward. (Did you pray?) Make sure you pray, and pray believing that God will answer. This is your last opportunity before reading the poem.

May today there be peace within.

May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith. May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.... May you be content knowing you are a child of God... Let His presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us. Now, send this to 11 people within the next 5 minutes and remember to send this back...I count as 1...you'll see why.

Suggestion: copy and paste rather than forward

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One thing that I actually do appreciate about this email is that it is a cut and paste job rather than a carrot laden italicized forward job. I hate when a bunch of AOL users forward an email, because each forward encapsulates the email in another envelope which must be opened by me. Some of these can have 20 or more envelopes, which takes that much more time to open just to find that I have wasted my time to find the same email that I have been getting for more than a decade.

This email says "I was asked by a very special friend as part of her religion class who I thought would DO this. I hope I chose the right twelve. " I wonder what that is supposed to mean. Oh, I get it! Who else chose 12? OK, I see, unspecified friend taking unspecified "religion" class choosing 12, hopefully I'm among the right 12, etc, except that the person who forwarded this to me didn't start it; this text was only cut and pasted from who knows how many forwards. This email is also very poorly written with several run-on sentences and other statements that don't even count as sentences.

I have to wonder where we as humans get the idea that forwarding an email absolves us of all responsibility for our actions on this earth. It's as if we can say "Oh, look, I'm going to save this country because I forwarded that George Carlin-esq rant about border security!" "Well, I've never actually witnessed for Christ, but I did pass along that Power Point file to all of my friends, family, and coworkers."

No one reads my blog anyway, so I would like to add that this email came from a close friend of mine from my church who really hasn't had much time for me lately. We're both busy with our families, with teaching classes, and with our work on the church expansion project so that we barely have time to exchange "what's up; nothing much" in passing. But does including my email address among 11 others count as buddy time?

I am a great fan of the internet and email. My wife thinks that I need psychiatric help. When we travel, I like to have an internet connection. She considers it nice to get away from the internet, I don't consider myself to be running from it. However, I don't believe that the internet can replace personal, community, and civic responsibility. Don't send me a "blessing" in an email, or a "prayer", insist that I spam my entire address list or I don't love Jesus, and expect that to count as friendship. It doesn't. I consider it annoying, especially when these emails are sent to my work address and I have to waste valuable time deleting them when I could be working (or slacking off, but I consider deleting these silly emails work, and I get enough junk on the company all hands list).

If you want to save the country, forward those rants to your Congressman. If you want to inspire people, then spend some one on one time with them. Don't forward them somebody else's words with an admonition to spam everybody that they know with the email. You couldn't raise your children by forwarding them silly emails, and you can't maintain a friendship by it either.

Let's keep email where it belongs and use one on one contact where we can. Please, our sanity depends on it.

Patrick Mead Series On Parenting

2006-05-04T17:20:00.000-04:00

Patrick Mead has two doctorates and serves as a pastor of the Rochestor Church of Christ in Rochestor Hills, Michigan. He was invited to do our church's vacation Bible school in 2004, and his lesson series was a tremendous hit. We invited him back again this year.

He has a blog like many of us, and is currently doing a series on parenting. I find this series to be more impressive than the spiritual warfare series that he did for VBS, and that blew me away.

His blog is Tentpegs.

How Do Women Do This?

2005-11-10T06:38:00.000-05:00

My family has been impacted by a cold over the last two weeks. We're all congested and coughing. My kids are so congested that when I hold them on my shoulder, it sounds like they're purring. I jokingly said "Babies aren't supposed to purr."

The other day, my wife called me at work. She was so sick that she couldn't handle the kids. Thankfully, her sister stays with us, so she was helping but had to go to work. I decided to come home and watch the kids for the day.

By the end of the day, I was utterly exhuasted. I got home at about 1000 and took the kids from my sister in law so she could get ready for work. Because they've been sick, the baby has been sleeping a lot, which really helped. When he was awake, I needed to hold him. When he was asleep, I was down on the floor playing with Joshua, our 15 month old toddler. Joshua climbs on and get into everything, and even more so when the baby is occupying the attention. I find it easier to stand with the baby so I can follow Joshua around the room, but then he wants to be picked up. That left me with a 13 pound baby on one arm and a 26 pound toddler on the other.

For lunch, I threw the kids in the car and hit the drive thru window that my sister in law works. That's what daddies do.

My wife likes educational TV left on during the day. It's not quite as mindless and brainwashing as I had been told. I was happy to see that "Reading Rainbow" is still on. I enjoyed that show when I was a kid. It's sure outlasted "Star Trek- The Next Generation", and Levar Burton is still going.

I'm going to write in my other blog about how my sick wife still managed to drag herself out to vote. I was smart and voted on my way into work, since the polls open right when I'm leaving anyway, and the firehall we vote at is just a couple of streets over.

Though the day was exhuasting, it was a lot of fun to spend the time with my kids. Joshua laughs when I get down on my hands and knees and charge him. He also likes to be sat on my shoulders while I run around. Caleb, at 3 months, is all smiles. It's fun to lay him down and get him to smile. Unlike his big brother, he actually will sit still. I can sit him on my lap and hold him up and he's been content up to an hour so far. I have a newfound respect for what full time moms do, and a new found appreciate for the role I've been created for.

Random Musings for New Dads

2005-10-21T18:51:00.000-04:00

For a while now, I have wanted to write something for my blog that is geared toward new dads. I found out barely two years ago that I would be a dad. Now I’ve done it twice. As a computer geek, I went to the internet to seek advice, and at the time I did not find very much.  I’m not sure if anything useful has been added in that time, as I have mostly figured things out for myself. You may find the same thing to be helpful, but just in case, here are some random musings from my own experience.

First off, children can be hard. My oldest, Joshua, is barely 15 months and he is in to everything. Any cord in the open he will find. He will climb behind objects to find cords. I don’t know why he has such a thing for cords. If you want to know whether or not your house has been adequately baby proofed, I would be happy to bring him over and turn him loose. He’ll let you know in a hurry.  My youngest, Caleb, is going to be eating applesauce way ahead of schedule. He is always hungry. At barely 10 weeks old, he’s already taking more than 30 ounces of formula a day and 2 bowls of rice cereal. I guess he’ll grow up to be a hungry man. As I write this, I’m on a plane bound for Charleston, SC, and I miss the guys.

The best piece of advice I believe that I could give a new dad is that no baby has ever died from crying. You want the best for your children, but you can only do so much. There will be times when a baby will want to cry for hours and nothing is apparently wrong.  Your frustrations may grow. At times like these, if you have no one else to pass the baby off to for a time, it is all right to lay him down gently and step away for a few minutes. I have found that I liked it better when I was out of the room and my children were crying. That means I know where they are and they are all right. It’s when they aren’t making noise that you want to rush back in every few minutes to make sure that they are all right.

Babies are much more durable than you might think. With Joshua, I knew nothing about babies. I thought that they had to be lying down or held. I didn’t realize that you could do more. A lot of the crying that he did may have been simply from boredom rather than pain or hunger. Hey, women grow up around babies and dolls. We grow up around things we can build of destroy. I just didn’t know. The other night at dinner, we had Caleb lying on the couch when he started crying. I went in to get him, thinking he was hungry. He wasn’t hungry at all, and was perfectly happy to have me hold him upright on my lap while we ate. He just wanted to be with everyone else apparently. Sometimes he likes it when we lay him down or hold him so that he can see what’s going on. Babies can be much smarter than you think.

Remember always that you are the parent. Babies have very strong opinions and preferences, but you have the big picture. Joshua hated to be swaddled (that’s when you wrap a baby up tightly in a blanket while he’s sleeping so his arms don’t move and wake him up), but we had to swaddle him or he would wake himself up constantly. He hated it, but we were the parents and knew that he would eventually stop screaming and sleep. Caleb doesn’t mind it as much, but is much less active and only needs swaddling for long periods of sleep.

Babies can sleep on their stomachs. They actually sleep better that way, although you should never allow this without being there to supervise. They also need to be held. There is a line between spoiling and giving what they need. If we’re busy and can’t hold Caleb, he won’t sleep well at night.

I found that I had a hard time with fatherhood at first. I have been told that it’s hard to go from 1 baby to 2, but from 2 children to 3 isn’t bad. Actually, I had the hardest time going from 0 to 1. Going from 1 to 2 wasn’t bad after the first couple of weeks. I’ve heard that the dad doesn’t always bond well at first. I think that’s true in my experience. The mother carries the baby for 9 months and has that instant bond. For the father, your life changes and you don’t always get much out of it. It’s hard to describe the change I felt toward Joshua all in one moment. When he was about 6 months old, I was really sick one weekend. He couldn’t sit up by himself yet, but could hold himself up if you put him in a sitting position. My wife sat him in bed next to me, and he looked at me. I feebly said “Hey, Joshua”, and he fell in my direction and reached out for me. In that one moment, everything in my relationship with him changed. It’s like he became real to me in that moment when I realized that he knew who I was and still liked me. It’s very hard to describe.

You’ll make a lot of mistakes, but believe me, you won’t screw your children’s’ lives up right away. That takes years of neglect. You’ll get frustrated, angry, impatient, busy, but there’s always a new day waiting for you. Some things take care of themselves. My wife and I fought a lot when she brought Joshua to bed. I didn’t agree that he should be in the bed at all, but it became one of those mother hood things that can’t be overridden without destroying your marriage. I gave her a hard time because he wouldn’t go to sleep by himself. For a long time there, he needed about 8 oz of milk before bed. Then, one day, it just stopped. He didn’t need the milk anymore. He still needs help getting to sleep sometimes, but for the most part it’s not a problem.

I rushed through things with Joshua. I was just in a hurry to get out of that phase of life. I don’t know why. Now that we’ve had Caleb, I’m just trying to sit back and enjoy this time with my children. Now that I know I can handle two of them at the same time, now that I have some experience and knowledge of children, it’s a lot different.

I hope that my random airborne musings on that last 15 months can provide somebody with help and inspiration. Never be too proud to ask for help and advice. Us “veterans” are just itching to give it anyway. And if you have older children, I’ll probably be looking for advice from you before too long.

Reverse-Engineered Housekeeping

2005-08-09T13:38:00.000-04:00

I'll start this post by saying that it's directed mainly at Chrisitan men.

I often have a hard time with Biblical mandates such as "loving my wife as Christ loved the church" (Eph 5:25) and "looking not on my own things, but on the things of others" (Phil 2:4) . And yet, I am currently at a place where doing so is vital. My wife is scheduled for a C-section in two days for our second child. There is a need for me to take care of a lot of the housework. I can't say I'm enthusiastically jumping into that. We both have our own ways of doing things, and if I don't do them her way she can let me know what she thinks very quickly.

The other night I had a lot of clothes to put away, most of which were either hers or our son's. I offerred to do it, and she quickly told me I'd do it wrong. I told her that if she is going to tell me that I need to help then she is going to have to stand back and let me help.

Rather than rush though doing it my way, I tried somthing new. I reverse engineered her system of folding and storing clothes. I actually managed to get the baby clothes put away in a manner that she could be pleased with.

I know this will sound silly on the surface, and if it does to you then please continue on to other blogs. But if you're looking for a way to do something nice for your wife, and this idea resonates with you, then give it a shot.

Welcome to my new blog

2005-08-05T15:17:00.000-04:00

I decided to start this blog in order to remain focused. I have another blog: http://emuelle1.blogspot.com, which is more of a socio/political commentary. I recently read an article about blogging, and realized that we all do have our own expertise that someone else might actually be interested in.

I thought about changing my theme to famliy life, or to technology, but then it hit me what I might want to concentrate on. As I write this, my wife and I have a one year old and another child due any moment now. My wife stays home and I have a full time job. I have a really big computer hobby, I'm active with church, and I have a few volunteer activities I enjoy. I don't get out much, but I have a few friends I like to get together with now and again. None of these things work together, and yet they're all pretty vital to who I am. I admit that I wouldn't miss work very much, but it is important at this time. On top of all this, my wife and I both have to deal with our respective families. I'm taking distance learning classes at a Bible college. I'm sure by now that you understand, I can't do it all and yet it all must get done.

Now, when all the elements of my life come together it is often like mixing matter and anti-matter. On top of it all, I am a Christian, and I'm trying to take my commitment to Jesus Christ seriously, yet all too often I realize too late that I've blown it.

I realized that someone else might be in the same boat. Maybe you have a new family, and you're having a hard time putting it all together, especially while you're trying to follow Christ. I haven't found much useful advice on the internet, so I figure maybe I'll start putting it up myself. I've also learned from teaching a class in church that placing yourself in the public eye presents you with accountability.

I pray that some fruitful information will make it onto this page, and that families will be blessed by it.